It is my last week of being 27, oh my god I am 2 years away from 30 AHH.
In both of my girl WhatsApp group chats, I am the oldest or 2nd oldest, and with that comes a lot of responsibility as well as an extra year of experience and wisdom..
Like probably most girls my age, I have seen it all – the nice guys who are just too full on, the friend zoned guys, the not too bad but didn’t wow me guys, and the scums that walk this planet.
Meeting the different existing breeds of men made me learn that the way I treat someone also depends on how I feel about them.
I can be friendly but don’t have time for you Mel, needy Mel, I will do anything for you Mel and I don’t give a f*ck about you Mel. And it varied depending on the guy, that being said, I have always remained straight up to someone on how I feel about them.
However, in my time on earth I have come to find that there are consistent wastemen, that will eventually hurt every person they come across, regardless of the way they feel about them.. Simply because they do not have the emotional capacity to commit. Many of these men are disguised in the mask of an emotionally stable and respectful man so they can be hard to catch out! Take note that there are a few signs to look out for in order to uncover their real identity.
- How he talks to his Mum
How a man talks to his mum is a very good indicator on how he will be talking to you in a few years. If he is respectful and does a lot for his mum that is an amazing sign because he learnt as a child that a woman is a queen. However, if he is rude to his mum and doesn’t make time for her then the likely hood is he will eventually treat you the same..
2. He still has not introduced you to his family/friends
If you have been seeing each other exclusively for awhile and are an item, then a guy will want to introduce you to his friends and family, especially the ones closest to him. If you doesn’t, then chances are he isn’t as serious about you as you think! Many people get distracted by the fact that they have been asked to be exclusive so they start feeling important, but don’t be blinded sis
3. He has no hobbies and interest
If a guy loves to just stay in doors with his guy friends and watch football or play xbox then hunny, you will have a very boring relationship where you just stay in and order takeaway and you get extra excited because you managed to convince him to take you out for dinner and it isn’t your birthday. If you always have to try and make some plan to do something, and he always wants to chill – then SEE THE SIGNS GIRL.
He is not bothered about experiences, and if you like to go out and do things and live your life, then my friend, avoid this waste man.
4. There is absolutely 0 mention of you on Social Media
OK this one is currently debatable on my group chats… because some people really aren’t into social media and some girls even do not care. However, if you both have social media accounts and post things and you post about him but he NEVER posts about you then…… babes check his DM’s.
JK I do not condone that, but I would be a bit suspicious on why he isn’t showing you off publicly to people that follow him. That being said, my ex use to post about me on social media and he still found a way to slide into girls DM’s so trust your woman intuition on this, it is a powerful thing.
5. Money and ambition is lacking
Now this is another tricky topic- I have never dated a rich guy but I have dated a broke guy and it is very stressful.
I am not your teacher, I am not your mother and I am not your Bank.
If he cannot take you out for a non-extravagant meal or complains about spending money all the time then, be prepared for that to be your life because instead of chasing his goals and ambitions, he is just complaining about his current situation. I am not saying that if he is broke, he is a wasteman, because he could still be trying to build himself up and has ambitions that you can support him with. But if he isn’t doing anything about it then, let that wasteman go.
I am sure there are many other signs, some of you might be more intuitive than others and smell the waste immediately. But look out for these and I hope it helps you avoid any potential pitfalls, life is too short to spend any time with a wasteman – trust me, I know.
Also a big shout out to my girls for the contributions, my group chats continue to be my inspiration
XOXO Your Guru Mel