11 more days to the New year and I really cannot wait for 2017. I know, I know, its just a calendar date and if you want to make a resolution you should start today. But I actually have so much to look forward to, a new flat, a new job, a lot is changing.
Am I nervous? Hell yes! But I have learnt so much this year that I can only embrace the chance and welcome it with arms wide open.
The past few months have brought many ups and downs, like any year. But this year was slightly more dramatic yet I have come out on the other side, never feeling more free or strong. I hope the same goes for most of you, but many of you might still be facing rough times. I am by no means a know it all, nor do I claim to be perfect but I do take every lesson life teaches me and try to share them with anyone I care about, including anyone who is taking their time to read this.
- Always trust your gut instinct
I cannot stress how important it is to believe in yourself and the decisions you make. I was in a 4 year relationship with someone I loved a lot but it turned out they were not the person they made out to be and I was made to believe many lies. I knew something wasn’t right and it came to the point where he made me question myself and my sanity. I had to leave yet he continued to deny his actions and continued to blame me for running away from the relationship. But literally just a few days ago my suspicions were confirmed. I made a very lucky escape and I cannot thank God enough for giving me the strength to leave when I did, or I would have just been hurt more further down the line.
So do not let anyone question what you believe is true. I was lucky enough to eventually learn the truth and that gave me the closure I needed to move on. Sometimes you won’t get that truth, and that is when you just need to trust that you are right and keep it moving.
2. Don’t let yourself get too comfortable
Whether it is in a relationship, in an apartment or in a job, it is so easy to just get stuck in a routine and be too afraid to change it. I am not saying you need constant change, if you truly are happy then good for you, you have found that happy spot and have settled down, but you can still try a new challenge.
But especially in your 20s and early 30s, it is so important to embrace change and try something new. How else will you really know what is for you? Move to a different city for a few months or travel, try for a new job with new challenges. The world has so much to offer, do not settle for something just because you have become use to it. I loved my job and the people I worked with became family, but I was ready for a new challenge and environment. My last day was quite emotional but then I remembered that my new office was only down the road and I could still see these people outside of work.
3. Forgive, for your own sake
There are many toxic people who do not have good intentions. Some of them are good people, but some just really are the scums of the earth and can make your blood boil. You just want to tell the whole world how horrible they are and what they have done because you just cannot believe anyone could be so mean and cruel. Like my mom said, burn that bridge and make sure that person is on that bridge too.
Then, forgive them.
Yes, not because they deserve it but because you need to let go of all that hurt and anger and move on. Do not ever spend more than a few minutes or maximum a day hating someone, life is too short to give a person like that too much of your time. I feel so sorry for some people, because they will never know the true meaning of happiness and therefore, I forgive you for your actions because you did not know better.
Say it out loud ” I forgive you for your actions, you did not know better” and move on. Delete the numbers, in fact change your number! That’s what I am going to do next week. There is nothing more refreshing than a new haircut and a new phone number.
But most of all, just know that whatever is meant for you will find it’s way to you and every single thing moulds you into what you are at this very moment.
Do I have any regrets? I would love to say no, but I am only human and I do regret giving some people more of my time than they deserved. But it taught me and it was part of the journey I had to make.
One day, everything will make sense and you will thank every person, the good and the bad, for their role in your story, because they led you to find your happy ending.
To a New Year, oh and Merry Christmas everyone